summer holidays

Summer holidays for separated parents

With school summer holidays fast-approaching, parents will be making plans for their children. For separated parents, this may be a stressful time, particularly when there isn’t an amicable relationship with an ex-partner and you need to try to reach an agreement. Here are some tips for separated parents on how to achieve the best arrangements so that both the parents and their children enjoy their summer holiday.

Plan ahead

During the pandemic, research showed that one third of parents found it difficult to adhere to their parenting plan arrangements. This will be the first year since the pandemic that parents will be able to enjoy taking their children on a “normal” holiday. Therefore, aim to be organised and let the other parent know what holiday arrangements you would like. The best thing is to sort out holiday arrangements in advance when all other co-parenting arrangements for the children are made, whether by agreement or court order. If this happens, then everyone, in particular the children, will know where they stand.

Listen to your children

Ask your children what they would like to happen. When children reach a level of maturity and understanding, they will want their voice to be heard. Arrangements are more likely to be successful if they feel they are being listened to.

Minimise the number of changes

Avoid disruption, and where possible, it is better for children to have extended time with the parent with whom they do not live with. This tends to work better for older children.

Paperwork check

If you are planning on taking your children abroad and they have a different surname to you, it is worth having written permission from the parent whose surname they share, detailing their address, contact details and passport number.

Communication

When possible, communicate with the other parent. If parents are in dispute over arrangements, talk to one another. This will help to significantly minimise the negative impact on the children.

If parents are unable to sort out arrangements, what are the next steps a parent can take?

The parents should attend a mediation appointment with a family mediator. A family mediator can help parents to reach an agreement over holidays.

In the event that mediation does not work, a parent may make an application to the court for a Specific Issue Order. A Court’s primary consideration is the welfare of the child and what is in his/ her best interests. The court has a legal checklist to consider, which includes the wishes and feelings of the child, their needs and their age.

In most cases, the court will want children to spend time on holiday with both parents. Most of all, parents should make the holiday as enjoyable as possible for everyone.

Rashmita Vadher, Managing Associate, Family and Matrimonial team, Ince (Bristol)

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