The year 2020 has brought pain to many and in many different forms, from job loss, financial worries, illness and even death, the pandemic has struck a nerve with everyone. But what if no one can see your pain?
Coronavirus aside, domestic abuse is a silent killer that can cause pain, frustration, and mental exhaustion for days, months and even years. The unfortunate reality is that these two viruses have entangled themselves together and created a much bigger problem.
The First Lockdown
It wasn’t long before we started hearing incidents on the news of a rise in domestic abuse cases, which were fueled by the fact that people were unable to go to work or leave their house entirely, unless it was for a walk around the block.
If we put this into perspective and pandemic to one side, the Government has recorded that within the UK there are around 2.4 million victims of domestic abuse a year, aged between 16 and 74. Two thirds of those are women.
When the pandemic first struck, in March/April time, Refuge, who are one of the UK’s largest domestic abuse charities, reported a huge 700% increase in calls in just a single day. These sobering numbers and other similar reports seemed to be making their way to the forefront of headlines during the first lockdown.
That’s not all, aside from an increase in phone calls and messages, domestic abuse killings had seen a higher-than-average number between the 23 March and 12 April. A survey by charity SaveLives discovered that 61% of those who spoke out said they were unable to get the support they needed because their perpetrator was at home, leaving them without access to a phone or any online support.
An Alternative Escape
Regulations were quickly altered and updated to allow vulnerable individuals to leave home and join another home that was considered safe. The government put in place guidelines to ensure that if you were experiencing any form of domestic abuse, you could join another household.
This may have brought some form of relief for adults but what if you’re a child going through this experience? You don’t have a car, any money of your own or any means of being able to leave the house and get to safety.
This was another reason for schools staying open before and after September (with some limitations before) as it allowed for children who may be victims of domestic abuse to find safety in teachers and other children their age.
Funding and Involvement
Domestic abuse and violence charities have been around for decades (unfortunately) but that doesn’t stop those who have experienced domestic abuse firsthand to try and help other vulnerable individuals by setting up their own charities to contribute to the cause and support both men and women who are unable to find help elsewhere.
During the first wave of Covid-19 there were several campaigns set up, one most notably the #YouAreNotAlone Campaign, which involved anyone from charities to small and large businesses to presenting an opportunity to vulnerable people by displaying a picture of a heart on their palm.
This was a simple signifier that someone was there to help, should an individual need it. The campaign originated by Home Secretary Priti Patel who wanted to reassure people that regardless of a pandemic, help was still available for anyone who needed it.
Although alterations to lockdown restrictions may have provided some with a glimmer of hope, one thing in particular that should provide more sustained help is the domestic abuse bill which is due to become law in early 2021.
Significant reforms in England and Wales come as a part of the bill which will introduce new measures such as the recognition of children as victims and a ban on the ‘consent’ to rough sex. Councils in England will have a statutory duty to provide alternative accommodation for victims.
How can we learn from this?
As we enter a New Year, there will be many of us thinking how can make this a better year. Something that everyone could benefit from learning is the signs of domestic abuse.
In most circumstances it seems that unless you have a physical mark, you’re not a victim, as you don’t fit the ‘stereotype’, which is incredibly worrying, considering that most domestic abuse cases are verbal or mentally abusive and involve coercive control.
Many domestic abuse victims won’t speak of their experiences, sometimes because no one asked. Personal barriers keep them locked away from asking for help and many feel shame that they are a victim of domestic abuse.
The second pandemic lockdown was no stranger to the first and charities such as Women’s Aid shared their worries for domestic abuse survivors going into another lockdown, that help would always be available, regardless of any lockdown put into place.
How can we learn to recognise the different forms of domestic abuse? As previously mentioned, domestic abuse comes in more than one form
Psychological and emotional abuse creates fear, humiliation, and embarrassment. You may also find victims of psychological abuse isolate themselves from friends and family. Insults and name-calling which seem relentless are also signs of emotional abuse, so to make victims have little self-respect.
Financial abuse is difficult to recognise but if you find an individual is having difficulty controlling their own money because of their partner, there could be more to investigate. In some cases, abusers will prevent victims from working at all, so not to earn their own money.
Any of these forms of domestic abuse can happen to both adults and children and so being able to identify certain signs which can in some cases be very subtle to almost unnoticeable, especially when it comes to finances.
Taking the time to support and help potential victims may give them the confidence to confide and seek further help either in you, or with any of the many charities available for both men, women, and children.
